Upside Down Hallelujah

A holiday.....
That's what I need.
Ya'll know what people get on with on holiday.....
Just a room with a bed in a different location.
"Didn't come back with no photos....
Lost the camera."
Sure you did.

One big fucking change of scene.
Some far way place
Where they don't speak English,
So I don't has to listen to no more bull shit for a while.
Some place where theys be dinin' differently....
Eat their food with them funny little sticks...
Chewing on that roasted doggy right off the spit....
And got a chicken named Spot...for a pet....shit
With his own bedroom
Take 'im on the bus---
To chicken school

That is fornicatingly foreign.
I be hangin' with them foreign people....
Cun see it now.
Big towel on my head...
Ridin' camels down the highway...
Passin' up police cars
Ninety miles an hour
Humpin' away.

Why do they wear their bedsheets in the daytime
And their clothes at night?
It all backward.....just the ticket.
I need an upside down hallelujah basically.

Or maybe just a desert island.
Me and my honey.....all alone....
Kingin' and Queenin'
I got to thinkin' about that the other day.
There we is all parked up pretty...
On a tropicallll.... paradisicallll... desert island.
With just one palm tree.
And you know?
It were so damn hot....

I were lickin' my lips.
Even the flies were layin' down.
Couldn't think straight.
I was missin' my air conditionin' right away.
Then my favorite tv show--The Tulip Hour.
Hell, I was even missin' Chicken Shack.

We had nothin' to drink.
Nothin' to smoke.
Nothin' to eat.
And after a while,
Nothin' to say.
Fish were jumpin'
Up out of the water.
Could we catch um?
No. Not for shit.
I was so hungry for something, I started eatin' ma own toe nails.
And when I were done, I started on his toe nails....
'Course he liked that.
So next time I in need of a holiday,
I thinking now I'll just quietly check into the Holiday Inn.

(Spoken time 2:10)