Tuesday 29 January 2008

People in the next painting

1. Umberto knows of a lingerie shop where the dressing rooms are co-ed. 2. Rumble manages a beach in St. Tropez. He is on and off yachts and women all summer long. 3. Mr. Ying uses his alternative Chinese medical knowledge to pick up women in supermarkets. He starts by reading moons on fingernails. 4. Fred is not a dosser. He's a camper. He camps in Hyde Park. 5. Dave paints pictures of pumpkins. He likes this as they are believable any size. 6. Roger says that regret is more costly when it is something that didn't happen. 7. Louise had her teeth out as she is undergoing chemo. She is on a drip feed and ate half a weetabix last week. 8. Her six month old son Jack is named after Jack Daniels. 9. Annette is tired of donating her time to Diabetes UK as the director gets a six figure income, and she gets lunch.10. Elizabeth has moved again from Palermo to Venice. The hot weather and the hot debates were too much. 11. She knows too many people who have died mysteriously. 12. The hot dog men don't like to pay parking for their transit van...so they have a plan. 13. Cynthia wants her daughter to make a will. She thinks she's going to outlive her daughter.14. John has a habit of collecting and hoarding cardboard boxes. 15. Liza has a callous on her neck from playing the violin. She teaches at Juliard. 16. Zoe has 5000 calories worth of creamer in her coffee each week. 17. Mark gets half a cow from his sister every year as she has a farm in Nebraska. This requires an extra deep freeze. 18. Zoe does not eat sausages as they have too much sodium. Carrots are her only vegetable. 19. Ron and Sue go to the Burning Man every year to watch arty people like naked orange man stroll around. 20. Sue is taking a break from "reality" and has rented a farmhouse with a view of the horizon. 21. She went to Peru to think about what to do. 22. Mari's time is taken up with taking the cat to the vet and deciding which herbal tea would be best. 23. Doug Furze has a big fireplace and a big ashtray. He organised a salsa competition and used the proceeds to buy guitars for a school. 24. Cheap Trick live in a small town and played at my high school prom. 25. Agnes works at a gym. She works up a sweat on the computer. 26. Kay packed up her lifetime's belongings to move to Brighton , but the moving van never arrived. 27. Kevin has had a hole in his living room floor for the past two years from moving the stairs. He does a little dance around it rather than repair it. 28. King of Kink--no strings, but violins. 28. Tony makes Cannelloni for his favourite neighbours every Wednesday. 29. Allison danced her way through law school at the finest clubs in New York. 30. Arthur has two names, but neither one is real. 31. "I couldn't dance with you, so I had to satisfy myself with filming you in my mind."--Gabriel's best line. 32. Josephine runs a ski shop in a small village in The French Alps. He daughter misses"la plage" 33. Rumble's mother refers to him as the taller blonder version of Tom Cruise. 34. John studied psychiatry up to the last semester--then he met Molly and missed his exams. Now, as an electrician, he rewires houses instead of people.35. Mari's time is taken up with choosing which variety of herbal tea to drink and which alternative therapy she is in need of next. 36. Roofer Mike stole a piece of cheese in Key West when he was seventeen. He was dodging the Vietnam draft and had to move around. He is no longer allowed into Canada because of this offense. 37. Rufi never did his militairy service in Turkey, but he has dual citizenship...so he stays in Bulgaria. 38. Gertrude's Derridian way of speaking has limited her social circle. 39. Crispin lives above a funeral parlour. The formaldehyde keeps the rent down. 40. Zoe has half a cow in her basement. It lasts a year and is divided into hamburger and steaks. 41. Cynthia curses the rabbits while she is mowing the grass. Little does she know, the neighbours can hear her. 42. Cynthia's neighbour cut down part of her tree as the shade was falling onto the neighbour's lawn. 43. Sharon is bi-polar. That is why she cuts the lawn three times a week.44. Helen is a vicar's wife, but she's an atheist. 45. Pedra lives at the base of Mount Vesuvious. 46. Ben put his Y-fronts on backwards and didn't feel a thing.47. Isabelle wonders if it would be boring in Bora Bora.48. Curtis worked in a hotel in Nevis. She got the job while on holiday. She wishes she would never have left. 49. Elizabeth had a bookcase that opened onto a secret room. She lives behind very thick doors. 50. Lorenzo is a postman. That is all he knows. 51. Allison will move to Palawan once her baby is six months old. 52. Charmione is an opera student with a bright future despite the odds. 53. Freedom has two pet chickens and a check from Mary Boone for a quarter million dollars stuck on her bulletin board. 54. Walking around Lago Averno, Saverio stops by the apple orchard.55. Riccardo is a DJ in Aosta. He has written a book called "The Sex Appeal of Error." 56. Raphi lives in a trance state and commutes four hours a day.

Painting Show at The Hospital

Show List of Joanne Morgan

2008 The Hospital—Covent Garden…group show

2007 CafĂ© Royale, London Folk Club, Hootananny’s—London Performance Art

2006 Columbia College Center for Book and Paper Arts—Chicago

2006 Koeline Museum, Des Plaines, Illinois

2005 Royal Academy Summer Exhibition--London

2004 Sale of Collage Paintings to Sprintex/Paris

2004 Walsh Gallery, Chicago Two-Person show

2004 Area Ten, London Performance Art

2003 Edinburgh Festival Performed Monologues of Double-Door Norma

2002 Neils Yard solo show of paintings.

2001 Figli Di Nerone, Naples, Italy Alphabet group show in large glass cases set in walking tour of historical distric of Naples forming the letter N.

2001 Atlier VIs-a Vis International Book Arts Show, Marseille France.

2001 St. Stephen Museum, Srakosvehervar, Hungary. International Book Arts Show

2000 Europe Art Train Exhibition Krakow, Poland as part of European CIty of Culture 2000.

2000 Benton Harbour Michigan, Cultural Center Solo Show

1999 Taegu International Textile Show

1998 Sejong University Art Gallery Solo Show

1996 Lake Forest Academy Gallery Solo Show

1995 Betty Rhymer Gallery Merit Scholar Show Art Institute of Chicago

1992 World Tattoo Gallery Two-person show with Don Ed Hardy. Books and paintings.

Collections

Bill Zehme—writer Esquire Magazine, Chicago

Jean Brice Viaud and Elizabeth Harbonne—architects, Versailles

Cincinnatti Tool and Steel—Rockford, Illinois

Atlier Vis-A-Vis, Marseille, France Public Artist Book Archives

Chunghie Lee—Fashion Designer,Seoul, Korea

John Doeringer--Chicago

Shilan Fine Shilan Accessories--Chicago

St. Stephen Museum, Hungary

Victoria and Albert Museum, London Korea Diary 97

Peter Gauschti—Founder of Swiss Bel Hotel—Hong Kong

Richard Martin, London

Raphael Barbier—Set Designer, Bern, Switzerland

Zoe Morgan---Kansas City

Ken Locascio--Architect, Chicago

Roger and Lyn Becknell—Abbot Plastics, Rockford, Il.

The Maggios, Naples, Italy

Elisabeth Gluckstein—curator, Venice, Italy

Matthew and Ellen Dinerstein---photographer, Chicago

Bob Drea and Stephanie Arena—Photographer/writer--Chicago

Awards and Publications

£1,500.00 Arts grant from Kings Cross Community Chest 2007

Chicago Sun Times Review of show at Columbia College March 17, 2006

Korea Herald Travel Journals of Joanne Morgan 98

Rockford Register Star Sketchbooks of Joanne Morgan 92

Chicago Tribune Wicker Park Art Festival 88

$30,000.00 scholarship School of the Art Institute of Chicago 93-95

National Scholastic Gold Medal for Water Colour USA 84

Tuesday 22 January 2008

Red Towel Relief

Thank goodness
The towel that blew off someone's washing line
That has been on the fourth floor ledge of the building
For the past few months
Has finally dropped into the garden.
This soaking wet red towel
Has been bringing me down.
I even thought of volunteering
To get on their balcony with a broomstick
And nudge it off.
What a relief.
This has made my day.
And the sunshine's out.

Friday 18 January 2008

The One Day

The end of the day goes on and on.
The end of the day is the morning.
If the answer is always going to be yes
And you seem to know it
Trust myself, but not my spirit.
Sacrifice my morals for my soul
Something society stole.
The is and isn'tness of life.
How it is all intertwined.
I'll wander in the wind
Til the way finds me
Somewhere between never
Sometimes, and oneday.
A Sunday of somedays
Some sunny fine day.
When you haven't spoken all day.
I meet the life outside my door
And somehow it keeps me in line.
If I take refuge inside my house,
The weather blows me away.
It's the clouds that hold their rain
That billow in the sky
Turning blacker everyday
And sometimes it's one white sheet
Like the inside of a bubble
That lets nothing in and nothing out.

Chat or conversation

Having a party?
Oh. It's just a soiree with some colleagues.
A very certain type...but yes
...under the umbrella of parties.
I suppose parties are for little ones.

Thursday 17 January 2008

World Tour Burnout

Chris Hansen is experiencing WTB.
World Tour Burnout.
Too many altruistic deeds in too many places.
Permaculture farming in Palma.
Passing out condoms to sex workers in Cuba.
Cycling for Cystic Fibrosis.
Gay Pride Marches in Israel.
Putting a roof on the Faerie Community in Tennessee.
Where to go next?
He's thinking of settling down.
How can he ever settle down
When there are so many emergencies in the world?
He's sent out a mass e-mail to all concerned
Asking those who know him best
To suggest a location.
A Virtual Vote.
There's an idea for a website....
Put your problem on the internet and then ask
Anonymous people to vote on a solution...cool.
I'll be a millionaire.
So he's thinking about it while he housesits
at his brother's in upstate New York
One of three VP's for Bayer Aspirin
And won't he be glad of his lifetime supply
With Christopher posing as gardener.

Obituary Olympics

We git a Chrustnas card frin The Oratts.
Actually, that's an interesting new language
Which comes from trying to smoke a cigarette while typing.
Don't smoke and type.
Unless ofcourse, you want a new language in your life.
That would be smoking.
I'll start again.

We got a Christmas card from the Pratts.
We knew it was from the Pratts as they sent a photo.
So we could identify them.
But they have changed their last name
As nobody, even if they are a Pratt,
Wants to be a Pratt.
To The Ozbournes....
Really dull.
And they spelled it wrong too
As Osbourne is usually with an "s".

Pratts at heart.

It was ailments every other line....
More ailments than family members.
Everything from heart attacks to corns on feet.
No body part was left untouched.
The first two ailments, we read and recoiled
Feeling a little sad for them
But as the list went into two pages
very large stationery
We were busting our guts by the end of it
As no one can take too much misery.
I think they won the hospital decathalon by miles.
Maybe next year, they can win the obituary olympics
But they, unknowlingly and most definetly
Cheered us up by sending us their own brand of Christmas Joy


We look forward to hearing from them
The Old Pratts, New Pratts, Ex-Pratts, OzPratts next Christmas.
Maybe they'll change their name again.
But there's five of them so that's a lot of paperwork.
Bank statements, school records, mortgage titles.
All of that to change.
Plus telling all your friends...
"Oh we are no longer Pratts."
I never thought of them as "pratts"
Until they changed their last name.
I wonder if they'll be out of hospital by next year.
Who knows
Maybe they'll all die.
Oh I can't end on such a dark note...
Maybe they'll all join a health club.
Hmm...not as entertaining.
Basically, of course...I/we wish them all well
And hope they don't have another year of hell,
But if they do, please tell.

And to think
They have all these accidents and illnesses
Without even leaving their own town.
Mavis hadn't recovered from her minor surgery
So she was feeling unable to look after her cat
Which is blind in one eye and has stiffness in her hind legs.
The stiffness is from being pinned under a shopping trolley
Many years ago....a freak accident which left her much less docile.
Dossy was her name as she really was so docile...from birth.
However, Mavis passed Dossy onto Matilda, her neighbour
who one day, fed dossy, the rat control pellets instead of Friskies.
And now....Mavis has dislocated her back
making a pilgrimage from her house
to the cemetary which is half a mile.
However, carrying a tombstone and a dead cat...(the cat coffin was ornate and must have weighed itself over 8 pounds), a half a mile is a long way.

Tuesday 15 January 2008

I Believe in Facebook

I believe in Facebook.
I believe in having friends that you don't know
Who don't know you
They may or may not have real friends.
But real friends take so much time
And I'm so busy
with collecting pictures of people
who look cool
That I don't have time anymore
For my real friends.

Monday 14 January 2008

Lila at Hootananny's

Hello.
I'm Lila The Ex-Pat Polish Princess.
You can also call me Princess Lila or just
My Princess.
However, as we are not that intimitate....
yet, Princess Lila is probably the more
Attractive option for now.
You...You are all drinking beer out of large glasses.
But where am I? Usually, I am surrounded
By long flutes of champagne or at least
goblets of wine.
A tip...
If you are so lucky to be invited to my
Impossibly beautiful and stately home,
Off Wood Green High Road
Peppoli 97... (Novanta sette) an Italian Chianti would be one of
a the many tokens of appreciation
I would appreciate from you for
my warm and most charming hospitality.
Also some trinkets.
This man...over there.
He has been fondling his packet of cigarettes all night.
You would think he could atleast do it under the table.
I suppose he does not have a girlfriend.
Or his girlfriend is so hot
That he has to fondle something when she is not there.
I must warn him, that is now public knowledge
That you can not smoke in a bar like this
Or a bar that is not like this...
Any bar in fact.
Quite similar to being married isn't it.
You can only smoke at home.
I risk the possibility of our future friendship
Being completely erased and destroyed
If he lights up.
As I will tell the management right away.

Thursday 10 January 2008

True as Fact

Mike: "My son lives in a church....land he's the mayor of the town. I live in a store, and my son, Andy, lives in a chicken coop. Joseph is the only one who owns a real house....and I'm a builder, so what went wrong?"

Andy: Hey. It's alright Dad. Who's complainin'? Out here, we use chickens for currency....which makes me ...the banker.

Mike: That's a good spin to put on it son. True as facts are. Now, I'll be tellin' people my son's a banker. If that ain't a step up, I don't have a ladder.

Andy: Rightly so... as you should. My nest is feathered. I'm even sellin' the eggs.

Mike: Well why don't we make it a family business and you can sell your eggs right here in the store?

Andy: Great idea Dad, but all my customers are local. That would confuse them. They buy the chickens and the eggs at the same time.

Mike: But wait a minute. I thought you said you got paid in chickens.

Andy: Oh no. That's chicken shit.

Mike: Never knew bankers to be honest.

Sunday 6 January 2008

wish number ten

I think it's wish 10 that I have to move up a few notches. Let's put it in position eight for now, as I can go a few more months with the strange knocking downstairs--maybe I will develop some cello and piano to go with it. But it is a classical beat or more rock? I think more rock.....70's. sometimes sounding like fake DIY and at other times, sounding like a woman in a one bed band....Let's see....I'll start in the kitchen, bang on the door and ceiling alternating between the two, then I'll go in the hallway, open the airing cupboard and bang a few lines on the water heater, in the bedroom...knock knock knock with the soft end of the broom so that it's a quiet sweepy noise-almost pleasant. And if she doesn't knock back, I'll just keep knocking until she calls the noise patrol. Perhaps I should ring her and give her their number.