Oh Mighty Isa

Some people think, cause you got a door, they gotta knock on it.
Well. I tell ya.....My welcome mat is for my friends.
It ain't written in seven different languages.
It don't say, "Welcome everybody and anyone. I got nothin' to do, so let's come on."
But, there's always somebody who can't read. so...
Some who-are-you
Comes a-knockin' on my door other day....
With
A leather briefcase
Just waitin' to take all my money.

I said, "Hey brother. It ain't gonna fit in there. I got lots o' money."
He says,"It ain't no briefcase maam. It an attache...(a tash ay)"
A tash shay...is that the French word for ashtray or sommin'?
I say excuse me Mr. Attache. What is it you want seein' as you already have a briefcase?
Looks like a briefcase to me.
I keep up with the papers.
I didn't see they changed the word for it.

"Ain't it a nice day maam..."
Don't try to change the subject.
Don't trip me up with your "nice day."
It is a nice day and I don't got all day for you.
So what you sellin'?
Girlscouts with the cookies, Jehovahs with the Jesus magazines, life insurance, death insurance, house insurance, pet insurance.
Be assured. I don't need no insurance.
"I assure you maam. I ain't sellin' insurance today."
Oh. That must have been yesterday.

"I am wonderin' if I can interest you in a 6.5% ISA. You can put up to $3,000.00 in it."
An ISA? Is that anything like Isis? Oh mighty Isis? She beat her chest and the heavens break out in thunder. I remember her. She a friend of Wonder woman.
"No Maam. Ain't nothin' to do with superheroes. It a banking term. It a special place to put your money."
I got me a special place to put my money. It called a pocket....big pocket too.
"With all due respect madame, I understand that you have pockets. However, it's my job to convince you that it would be better for you if you were to put your money in a pocket called ISA."

By this time, the man's throat was gettin' dry.
I seeeeeaid, "Young man...Are you sure you ain't just collectin' fa ya girlfriend. I bet her name's Isa. "