Friday 2 November 2007

Shoppin' Trolley Thievin' Club


(Continuation--to be read after the previous BYOB--BOYB)

N: Here we are. Go lock up the shoppin' trolley.

H: Lock it up? Who's gonna steal a shoppin' trolley?

N: We did you fool. You think we the only shoppin' trolley
thieves in the whole world?

H: In the whole world?... No. On this block? Yes.

N: You forgettin'...we with our friends tonight.

H: Oh yeah...The shoppin' trolley thievin' club.
Ya'll gotta bring your own trolley to be a member....
Lest you forget. Look....There's Edward's over there.

N: How do you know that's Edward's?

H: Number 509...same number as his house.
He put in a special order for it.
Took three weeks.
Didn't even steal it himself.
Paid someone to steal it for him.
Now if that ain't upscale crooked, what is?

N: That's stylin'. I reckon we need a number 27.

H: I reckon 137's good enough. Subtract the 1 from the 3...
And you got a two.....two and seven...just think of it that way.

N: What if I get mixed up and use addition instead?
I be goin' home the wrong way.

H: For God's sake Thelma

N: Thelma? My name ain't Thelma.
You be goin' home the wrong way soon.

H: Norma...It a shoppin' trolley.
Be happy with it. I ain't spendin'
No one hundred dollars to get it customized.

N: One hundred dollars? What is it ---turbo charged?

H: It's a turbo of a charge, but he got it delivered.

N: With delivery.... for shame... that ain't stylin'
That's just stupid.

H: Ok...it's silver plated. He didn't want me to tell no one.
That how come he got it locked up.

N: See! People do lock up their shoppin' trolleys.

H: Some people...but Norma. We ain't that stupid.
And if you really want....for Christmas....
I'll get you your own personal shoppin' trolley number
From Didgeree Don's.

N: Didgeree Don's...Whoop dee doo.
What about my other present?

H: I want ...I want....
That number's gonna be expensive honey.

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