Check the Plates

If you're living in a country
Where you can not read the road signs
It's best to have those diplomatic plates

And only drive on Sundays
Doesn't matter where you go...
Just as long as you get home
And no one knows
The details of your dates

Thank you for that car
The only car I ever drove
Never fined and never towed
As I have been

So colour blind at traffic lights
Clamped on double yellow lines
Missed the meter marking times
In the pound--a hundred fines

Next time I get a car
I'll check the plates before I sign

But I'll have to skip the offer of your van
As I don't know where you will drive it
Though you seem like a nice man
Some people curse the day they let the women drive
But I have got a bicycle, so I will stay alive